The abstinence model came to this topic from substance recovery, where it makes obvious sense. Sexual behaviour is not like that. It is a normal human function with a normal range, and total elimination is not the only way to fix a dysregulated relationship with it.
A systematic review of 47 prospective studies of short-term abstinence across six behaviours found that abstinence shows promise for porn use, while noting that counterproductive effects, meaning rebound and compensatory behaviour, had barely been measured. Promising and under-tested, not proven.
The clearest signal we have is a randomised trial of a 12-session acceptance and commitment therapy protocol: a 93% reduction in viewing against 21% in the waitlist group. Complete cessation was 54% at the end of treatment and 35% three months later, while 74% still showed at least a 70% reduction. Read those numbers next to each other: most people who did well got a large reduction, not zero. The sample was small and drawn almost entirely from one religious community, so hold it lightly, but it is the best trial there is.
None of that says don't quit. Plenty of people find total abstinence far easier than moderation, because "not at all" is a cleaner rule than "sometimes" and needs no decision every night. Bright lines are cognitively cheap; dials cost a decision each time.
The point is to choose. Quit, cut down, or conclude it was never the problem you were told it was: all three are legitimate ways to finish. Changing the goal deliberately is strategy. Abandoning it silently is not.
Where this comes from
Read the full lesson: Do you even need to quit? →
Sources and how strong they are (2)
- Mixed evidenceA randomised trial of 12-session ACT (n=28 adult men, all but one from the same religious community) found a 93% reduction in viewing against 21% in a waitlist group; 54% complete cessation at post-treatment, 35% at three-month follow-up, with 74% still showing at least a 70% reduction. Small, narrow sample.Crosby & Twohig 2016, Behavior Therapy 47(3):355-366, doi:10.1016/j.beth.2016.02.001, PMID 27157029
- Mixed evidenceA systematic review of 47 prospective short-term abstinence studies across six behaviours found abstinence shows promise for pornography use, while noting that counterproductive effects — rebound, compensatory behaviour — were poorly measured.Fernandez, Kuss & Griffiths 2020, Clinical Psychology Review
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